How to Write a Screenplay for a TV Detective Show
The 12 Steps to Writing a Screenplay for a TV Detective Show
This formula will work for Castel, The Mentalist, CSI, Criminal Minds, and others.
1. Opening scene: Episode opens with the female lead and male lead in bed (select one):
a. her apartment
b. his apartment
c. in a hotel
2. A cell phone rings (mandatory). One of the two must answer while the other says, “Don’t answer that!” To which the other must say, “We have to. We’re on call.” Whoever answers the phone must listen and then say, “We’ll be right there.” (Must act as if not going is an option. Must show disappointment) Optional additional statement-female lead says, “I will make it up to you.” Follow this with a coy smile. Male detective must smile.)
3. Both arrive at murder scene. (He/she) finds a piece of evidence overlooked by 12 other CSI people and 5 other detectives. (He/she) says, “Canvas the neighborhood and see if anyone saw anything. Also, check all the security tapes within a 100-mile radius and see what comes up. Check the ATMs while you’re at it and get me a cup of coffee.” (Everyone must slap their forehead as if they had never thought of that.)
4. (Select all that apply below):_________________ leads to (pick a number) ____suspects. . They haul them in to interview them
individually.
a. The evidence
b. The witnesses
c. The video tapes
d. The confidential informant
e. Intuition
f. Gut feeling
g. Good luck
5. One witness must look the most innocent (mandatory) because (he/she) is a (select all that apply):
a. nun/priest
b. virgin
c. democrat
d. has an iron clad alibi
e. passed a polygraph test
f. passed the drug test
g. is cute
6. Another suspect must look very guilty because (she/he) (select all that apply):
a. is a Republican
b. failed the polygraph test
c. has no alibi
d. voted for Nixon
e. looks guilty (shifty eyes, sweaty, bad hair do)
f. driver’s license expired
7. The detectives must show the guilty looking suspect all the evidence they have collected (mandatory) and tell the suspect all their theories on how the crime was committed. The suspect must still deny everything.
8. The detectives discover for the guilty looking suspect that (select all that apply):
a. the alibi checked out
b. the polygraph malfunctioned
c. the suspect had a prescription for the drugs
d. the suspect lied about voting for Nixon
e. the suspect looks cute after cleaning up
f. the (DNA/prints) do not match the crime scene evidence
9. One of the detectives uncovers (mandatory) some obscure piece of evidence that implicates the innocent looking suspect. They discover that the innocent suspect is (select all that apply):
a. not a nun/ priest
b. a not virgin (don’t ask how)
c. really a democrat
10. And that (his/her) (select all that apply):
a. alibi does not check out
b. DNA/prints match the murder scene
c. library card expired.
11. The detectives go to arrest the suspect and have a (select one):
a. car chase
b. foot chase
c. chase across rooftops
12. They arrest the suspect and interrogate him/her. They ask if he/she wants a lawyer. The suspect cracks under such a hard question and confesses (mandatory) to everything plus (select all that apply):
a. cheating on taxes
b. cheating on wife
c. cheating in college
d. cheating at cards.
e. poor acting
The End
This formula will work for Castel, The Mentalist, CSI, Criminal Minds, and others.
1. Opening scene: Episode opens with the female lead and male lead in bed (select one):
a. her apartment
b. his apartment
c. in a hotel
2. A cell phone rings (mandatory). One of the two must answer while the other says, “Don’t answer that!” To which the other must say, “We have to. We’re on call.” Whoever answers the phone must listen and then say, “We’ll be right there.” (Must act as if not going is an option. Must show disappointment) Optional additional statement-female lead says, “I will make it up to you.” Follow this with a coy smile. Male detective must smile.)
3. Both arrive at murder scene. (He/she) finds a piece of evidence overlooked by 12 other CSI people and 5 other detectives. (He/she) says, “Canvas the neighborhood and see if anyone saw anything. Also, check all the security tapes within a 100-mile radius and see what comes up. Check the ATMs while you’re at it and get me a cup of coffee.” (Everyone must slap their forehead as if they had never thought of that.)
4. (Select all that apply below):_________________ leads to (pick a number) ____suspects. . They haul them in to interview them
individually.
a. The evidence
b. The witnesses
c. The video tapes
d. The confidential informant
e. Intuition
f. Gut feeling
g. Good luck
5. One witness must look the most innocent (mandatory) because (he/she) is a (select all that apply):
a. nun/priest
b. virgin
c. democrat
d. has an iron clad alibi
e. passed a polygraph test
f. passed the drug test
g. is cute
6. Another suspect must look very guilty because (she/he) (select all that apply):
a. is a Republican
b. failed the polygraph test
c. has no alibi
d. voted for Nixon
e. looks guilty (shifty eyes, sweaty, bad hair do)
f. driver’s license expired
7. The detectives must show the guilty looking suspect all the evidence they have collected (mandatory) and tell the suspect all their theories on how the crime was committed. The suspect must still deny everything.
8. The detectives discover for the guilty looking suspect that (select all that apply):
a. the alibi checked out
b. the polygraph malfunctioned
c. the suspect had a prescription for the drugs
d. the suspect lied about voting for Nixon
e. the suspect looks cute after cleaning up
f. the (DNA/prints) do not match the crime scene evidence
9. One of the detectives uncovers (mandatory) some obscure piece of evidence that implicates the innocent looking suspect. They discover that the innocent suspect is (select all that apply):
a. not a nun/ priest
b. a not virgin (don’t ask how)
c. really a democrat
10. And that (his/her) (select all that apply):
a. alibi does not check out
b. DNA/prints match the murder scene
c. library card expired.
11. The detectives go to arrest the suspect and have a (select one):
a. car chase
b. foot chase
c. chase across rooftops
12. They arrest the suspect and interrogate him/her. They ask if he/she wants a lawyer. The suspect cracks under such a hard question and confesses (mandatory) to everything plus (select all that apply):
a. cheating on taxes
b. cheating on wife
c. cheating in college
d. cheating at cards.
e. poor acting
The End