1. I want a raise
2. It’s not my problem
3. I don’t do over time.
4. I don’t know.
5. I can’t work with…
I retired in 2011 after two careers and working most of life, and I can say that that list isn’t even close to what you shouldn’t say or ask your boss. Here’s my list of what you should never, ever ask your boss:
1. Ask for a date
2. Ask if it’s okay to bring your AK47 to work so you can clean it during your lunch break.
3. Ask if the boss is happy with the current drug dealer.
4. Ask if you can use the copy machine for pornography.
5. Ask if you should respond to the Nigerian financial opportunity.
6. Ask if you come in late, can you go home early.
7. Ask if it’s okay to have a clothing optional day.
8. Ask how old the boss’ daughter (or son) is.
9. Ask if the boss is using birth control.
10. Ask if that is the boss’ real hair.
In addition, you should never tell your boss that he’s an idiot or his ideas are stupid.
I hope this will help you get along with your boss in the work place.
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