Secret Service Needs New Oaths

The #SecretService is in the news once again. This time two senior-level Secret Service agents were "inebriated" and crashed into the White House grounds. This, of course, is not the first time agents have had problems holding their liquor. You may recall the incident in the Amsterdam one year ago when three agents were sent back for an alleged night of drinking. One of the agents was found passed out in a hotel hallway. It's no secret that agents also have a problem keeping it in their pants. Remember back in April of 2012 when a Secret Service agents brought strippers to their hotel in Colombia before the presidential visit to attend the Summit of the Americas? The solution is simple; the Secret Service agents need to take vows of celibacy and sobriety as a condition for employment. I would list these two immediately following, “I vow to take a bullet for the President if necessary.”