Mother’s Day is coming up as well as various birthdays. If you are a clueless man like me, you are terrible at selecting the right gift for your significant other. I wrote this short story with that in mind. It is a little long so I will split it into three parts. The title is, A Women’s Store for Clueless Men. Enjoy. Part 1.
He was totally lost in the women’s lingerie section, and hopelessly frustrated. His wife’s birthday was just two days away, and Roy had no idea what to buy her. He had driven by this particular store several times on the way to work, and chuckled at its name, “A Women’s Store for Clueless Men.” Now he figured it was time for him to go inside; he was about as clueless as any man could be.
“May I be of service to you, sir?” said the well-dressed salesman. “If you don’t mind my saying so, you look a bit lost.”
“No, I don’t mind. I am lost, and I am a dead man if I do not buy the right gift this time.”
“This time, sir?”
“Yes. Two years in a row, my wife has returned my gifts. She made it clear that if I do not buy something appropriate this time, she will start buy herself her own gifts. I just want to make her happy, and keep her off my case.”
“Well, sir, you have come to the right place. We specialize in helping men make the right purchase for their wives or girlfriends… or both,” he replied with a wink. “Do you have an appointment?”
“An appointment?” he asked. “Do I need an appointment to shop here?”
“Sir, we know from experience that men who shop alone often end up with ill-advised gifts and upset partners. I suspect that you made your previous purchases without consultation. Am I right?”
“Well, yeah! That’s how I got in trouble.”
“Exactly, sir. If I may, let me show you around the store, and tell you how things work and then I will set you up with an interview.”
“Interview? I need to be interviewed to buy a gift for my wife?”
“Sir, we cannot advise you on your purchases unless we know more about you, and in particular, more about your wife, now can we?”
“I don’t know. It seems rather strange.”
“Trust me, sir. Once I show you around the store, you will be much more comfortable and eager to do the interview. Shall we begin?”
“Yes, I guess so.”
“Let start with introductions. My name is John, and I own this store. And you are?”
“My name is Royal. Call me Roy.”
Stay tuned for Part 2.
He was totally lost in the women’s lingerie section, and hopelessly frustrated. His wife’s birthday was just two days away, and Roy had no idea what to buy her. He had driven by this particular store several times on the way to work, and chuckled at its name, “A Women’s Store for Clueless Men.” Now he figured it was time for him to go inside; he was about as clueless as any man could be.
“May I be of service to you, sir?” said the well-dressed salesman. “If you don’t mind my saying so, you look a bit lost.”
“No, I don’t mind. I am lost, and I am a dead man if I do not buy the right gift this time.”
“This time, sir?”
“Yes. Two years in a row, my wife has returned my gifts. She made it clear that if I do not buy something appropriate this time, she will start buy herself her own gifts. I just want to make her happy, and keep her off my case.”
“Well, sir, you have come to the right place. We specialize in helping men make the right purchase for their wives or girlfriends… or both,” he replied with a wink. “Do you have an appointment?”
“An appointment?” he asked. “Do I need an appointment to shop here?”
“Sir, we know from experience that men who shop alone often end up with ill-advised gifts and upset partners. I suspect that you made your previous purchases without consultation. Am I right?”
“Well, yeah! That’s how I got in trouble.”
“Exactly, sir. If I may, let me show you around the store, and tell you how things work and then I will set you up with an interview.”
“Interview? I need to be interviewed to buy a gift for my wife?”
“Sir, we cannot advise you on your purchases unless we know more about you, and in particular, more about your wife, now can we?”
“I don’t know. It seems rather strange.”
“Trust me, sir. Once I show you around the store, you will be much more comfortable and eager to do the interview. Shall we begin?”
“Yes, I guess so.”
“Let start with introductions. My name is John, and I own this store. And you are?”
“My name is Royal. Call me Roy.”
Stay tuned for Part 2.
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