Monte R Anderson - Author
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  • Fiction
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      • Night Predator
      • The Clone Murders
      • Angels and Gargoyles
      • Archimedes of Syracuse: Leonardos da Vinci's Mentor
      • The Register Cliff Rapist
    • Short Stories >
      • The Tyranny of GPS
      • Ash Wednesday Storm of 1962
      • Good Neighbors
      • What God Hath Joined
    • Plays/Screenplays >
      • St. Michael & Job
      • How to Write a Screenplay for a TV Detective Show
      • Detective Show Spoof
      • Angels and Gargoyles Screenplay
      • Archimedes of Syracuse Screenplay
  • Non-Fiction
    • Leadership for New Managers: Book Two
    • Facility Management Series: Types of Maitenance Programs
  • Stories from Elmira

The Price of Bull Crap Just Went Up

11/29/2014

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I read with interest that on #BlackFriday the card game, Cards Against Humanity, sold bullshit. No joke – real bullshit. The suggested price was $6 per box. It sold out in 30 minutes. It reminded me of an incident that happened years ago when I was stationed at Fort Bragg, NC. The Fayetteville police were tipped off about a guy selling grass. Sure enough, they found a farmer selling grass; not #marijuana – real grass. He sold it for $10 a bag. It pissed the police off so they charged him with vending without a license but they had to let him go. You guessed it – he had a license. It may have beginning of buying local and buying organic. Don’t mess with farmers. The old saw is, “Hay is for horses, Straw is cheaper, Grass is free.” Grass isn't free. 




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Intensive Rehabilitation Therapy for Bill #Cosby

11/21/2014

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Another woman has come forward to admit that she wasn’t sexually assaulted by comedian Bill Cosby. That brings the total of woman who worked with Cosby but weren’t assaulted to eight. I’m sure there are more who are fearful to admit that Cosby never touched them. Time will tell. We have seen this script before. Eventually, Cosby will agree to attend “intensive therapy”. Cosby, of course, continues to deny, deny, deny.
I was able to obtain from a confidential source a copy of the “Intense Therapy” that Cosby may undertake. The program known as Bogus and Unauthentic Legalized Larceny and Spurious Hypocritical Intense Therapy (BULL SH*T) is used through the USA to help famous stars to keep their endorsements and preserve their acting careers. Below is a copy of the sessions. This intense therapy is for one week.
Sunday Mixer: Join in a optional mixer for all attendees Sunday night at 7 PM until ? Meet the instructors and fellow actors who have fallen from grace. Open bar and free marijuana tasting (not yet available in all states).
Monday Sessions: How to Hold a Press Conference. Learn how to deny charges without using the telltale signs for lying. Learn how to say “intense therapy” with a straight face. Learn how to pronounce new words like “paparazzi”. Panel discussion with panelists Charlie Sheen, Eliot Spitzer, Alex Baldwin and Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Tuesday Sessions: Sexism 101: Learn the signs of sexism and how to hide them. Learn how to avoid being videotaped while sexually assaulting someone. Also learn how to pat down people for hidden cameras and microphones while hugging them.
Wednesday Sessions: Using Drugs for dating. Learn the proper way to slip a date-rape pill into a woman’s drink without getting caught.
Thursday Sessions: Stings are my Favorite Things. Learn to identify a sting operation. Learn to avoid a lawsuit and how to settle out of court.
Friday Sessions: Closing Ceremony: Graduation ceremony for those who have not dropped out of the program or been arrested.
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“Big #Booties” and How to Skin a Rabbit Part of School Curriculum

11/16/2014

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Two news items on #education caught my eye:

1. School officials in a #NC school have pulled a class assignment in a #genetics test that referred to a "big bootie." Rumor has it that the schools officials plead ignorance about the creation of the test question, blaming evolutionists. I’d have missed the question. I thought bootie had something to do with pirate loot. Times have changed.

2. In #Idaho, a #biology teacher may be disciplined after killing and skinning a rabbit in class. What? He killed it by snapping its neck. I recall dissecting large frogs in high school. No one protested about killing them. In college, it was cats, which is why there aren’t any stray cats in Bloomington, IN. Of course, they were already dead. Years later I ate fried frog legs – delicious. I suppose the teacher should have used lethal injection to kill the rabbit followed by a rabbit stew. Witch wine goes with rabbit? Do the protestors even know where chicken nuggets come from? I doubt that killing and skinning an Idaho potato would have had the same affect.

I guess my real concern is whether these incidents are part of #CommonCore and intended to make the USA more competitive in the world market.

AUTHOR'S NOTE FOR THE HUMOROUSLY CHALLENGED: This isn’t intended to be serious. Well, not completely.

 

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Veterans Day Tribute

11/9/2014

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I am having problems with this website publishing the items I post. Let's try again. sorry if this is confusing.

Veterans Day is coming up and every year at this time I pay tribute to the members of my family who are vets. My family has a long tradition of military service. My father served in WWII, the Korea War and twice in Vietnam. I was born soon after he returned from the South Pacific. He named me after my uncle who was killed in the South Pacific. My uncle's name was Marlin, but he did not like the name. He went by the name Monte, and that is the name my father choose for me. Thank goodness
, he did not pick Marlin. There is a VFW post in Wyoming named for my uncle in Wyoming. All of my father’s brothers served in WWII except one, but uncle Monte was the only one killed. My father and I had a six-month overlap in Vietnam.

My brother served two years in Japan during the Cold War listening to the Russian’s radio communications. Many members of my family continued to serve either on active duty or in the National Guard. My oldest son is an Air Force officer with over 20 years of service.

My step father, Raymond Macera, was a 20 year career soldier. During WWII he was captured in

Europe and held prisoner by the Germans for six months. I am also remembering some friends and classmates who died in Vietnam.

I think we tend to forget some of the non-military people who served in their own way. My mother, for example, was an Army wife for two military career officers and sent her son off to Vietnam (me). Even the children, the military “brats”, sacrifice when their parents serve their country. Now my grandchildren must sacrifice whenever their father has to leave home for an extended tour of duty. I salute them all-the dead and the living heroes.

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Veterans Day Tribute

11/9/2014

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    Author

    Monte is the author of several  e-books on Amazon and smashwords.com


    Buy Monte's e-books:
    The Throuple Private Eye--Business is Booming.
    ​​The Throuple Private Eye--Hate Crimes
    ​
    A Head for Murder
    The Register cliff Rapist
    The Clone Murders,
    Archimedes of Syracuse: Leonardo da Vinci's Mentor,
    Leadership for New Managers: Book Two

    FREE E-BOOKS:
    Angels and Gargoyles

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