Monte R Anderson - Author
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Finally, Pig Grunts Have Been Decoded

3/18/2022

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An international team of researchers from Denmark, Switzerland, France, Germany, Norway and the Czech Republic have translated pig grunts into emotions, successfully decoding a pig's emotions after analyzing over 7,000 acoustic recordings of grunts from over 400 pigs. (Sounds like an old joke.) I’m glad that our own government didn’t fund this endeavor. Of course, Tim Allen was way ahead with his stand-up comedy act. He decoded pig grunts for us years ago. There’s no truth to the rumor that Tim Allen was consulted for this project. I’m surprised that England wasn’t involved. Winston Churchill once said, “I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.”
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I’m sure that somewhere in this world there’re some people who eagerly want to hear what their pigs have to say. You can bet for pig farmers it won’t be nice. For those who have pigs as pets, (I’m talking about real pigs not husbands here.) it will probably be good. I, for one, can wait to find out what pigs think of us. It’s like explaining the difference between “being committed” and being “involved”. It’s like bacon and eggs; the chicken is involved, but the pig is committed.

We can only hope that Copenhagen will publish a translation book for wives, so they’ll understand us men better. Maybe there needs to be a book for men, so we can communicate better with our wives. We can only hope.

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    Monte is the author of several  e-books on Amazon and smashwords.com


    Buy Monte's e-books:
    The Throuple Private Eye--Business is Booming.
    ​​The Throuple Private Eye--Hate Crimes
    ​
    A Head for Murder
    The Register cliff Rapist
    The Clone Murders,
    Archimedes of Syracuse: Leonardo da Vinci's Mentor,
    Leadership for New Managers: Book Two

    FREE E-BOOKS:
    Angels and Gargoyles

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