DISCALIMER; This blog is intended as a satire and should not be taken seriously. Don’t attempt to follow these tips. Just follow my blog.
With #gasolineprices of going off the charts, here are some tips to save money on gas:
With #gasolineprices of going off the charts, here are some tips to save money on gas:
- Siphon gas from your neighbors’ cars. This could lead to dangerous confrontations, so do it in the dead of night while wearing ninja clothing. Of course, it stands to reason not to leave gas in your vehicles when parked outside overnight.
- Don’t drive at excessive speeds. If anyone honks, just turn on your turn signal and leave it on.
- Put the car in neutral when driving downhill. Better yet, drive only downhill.
- Have your family and friends push your vehicle.
- Place a sail on your vehicle to take advantage of the free wind.
- Don’t idle your vehicle while parked.
- Turn off your vehicle’s air conditioning, radio and all other devices.
- Tailgate behind large trucks so they break the wind and drag your vehicle with suction. Hey, ducks do it.
- Dead weight will increase consumption of gas. Get rid of excess weight like doors, windshields, windows, passenger seats, hoods, trunks, paint, and seatbelts.
- Harness several dogs to your vehicle and have them pull you.
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