Monte R Anderson - Author
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Intense Rehabilitation Therapy for #ScottRudin and #AmyPascal

12/12/2014

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A lot of buzz about leaked e-mails from #Sony. You read the news. Apparently, producer Scott Rudin called #AngelinaJolie a "spoiled brat" and made jokes about President #BarackObama. The hackers are believed to be #Gawker and #Buzzfeed, but authorizes think the real culprit is #NorthKorea. They think this because the name of #DennisRodman was conspicuously missing from any of the e-mails. Of course, North Korea is upset over the Sony movie, 'The Interview.' Rudin has apologized.
Making derogatory remarks about Jolie is unforgivable. Making jokes about President Obama is okay. Who knew Rudin was a republican? I thought most of Hollywood was democrats. Sony Pictures Entertainment chairman Amy Pascal, the other half of the e-mails, also apologized. Apparently, there is no truth to the rumor that Elizabeth #Lauten offered her support and advice to Rudin and Pascal.
No doubt both will volunteer to attend “intensive therapy” for their behavior. I was able to obtain from a confidential source a copy of the “Intensive Therapy” that Rudin and Pascal may undertake. The program known as Bogus and Unauthentic Legalized Larceny and Spurious Hypocritical Intense Therapy (BULL SH*T) is used through the USA to help famous stars to keep their endorsements and preserve their acting careers. Below is a copy of the sessions. This intense therapy is for one week.
Sunday Mixer: Join in an optional mixer for all attendees Sunday night at 7 PM until? Meet the instructors and fellow actors who have fallen from grace.
Monday Sessions: How to Hold a Press Conference: Learn how to deny charges without using the telltale signs for lying. Learn how to say “intense therapy” with a straight face. Learn how to pronounce new words like “paparazzi”. Panel discussion with guest panelists #BillCosby, #CharlieSheen, and #ArnoldSchwarzenegger.
Tuesday Sessions: Racism 101: How to insult the President and get away with it. Learn how to hide your true feelings about the president from the master of rants, #RushLimbaugh.
Wednesday Sessions: Public Apologies 101: Learn how to sound sincere when you apologize. Includes a practical exercise on apologizing without saying, “I apologize if…” 
Thursday Sessions: Learn How to Avoid Hacking: This panel discussion is hosted by #EdwardSnowden via Skype and includes such experts as #Target, #JPMorgan, and #HomeDepot.
Friday Sessions: Closing Ceremony: Graduation ceremony for those who have not dropped out of the program. Guest speaker will be #AlexBaldwin.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a fictional article. Quit calling me asking to sign up for the therapy.
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    Monte is the author of several  e-books on Amazon and smashwords.com


    Buy Monte's e-books:
    The Throuple Private Eye--Business is Booming.
    ​​The Throuple Private Eye--Hate Crimes
    ​
    A Head for Murder
    The Register cliff Rapist
    The Clone Murders,
    Archimedes of Syracuse: Leonardo da Vinci's Mentor,
    Leadership for New Managers: Book Two

    FREE E-BOOKS:
    Angels and Gargoyles

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