- Your significant other’s name: It’s okay to forget your significant other’s name. Wait until they go to sleep, and then check their driver’s license or other documents. If you still can’t remember, you can call them “honey” or “sweetheart” for several years. However, forgetting their name but remembering an ex’s name is a no-no. When you get a chance, steal a peek at their driver’s licenses.
- Kids’ names: Also, no big deal. Just use terms like “big guy” or “princess” until you remember. When you get a chance, look at your will. Their names are probably in there. No will? Then just forget their names.
- Passwords: This depends. If it’s a password for a web site, usually there’s a way to have them send you an email with a link to reset your password. Some sites will ask you security questions. If you can’t remember the answers, there may be a telephone number you can call. If you forget your computer password, you can always buy a new computer. If you can’t remember where you left your laptop, that a no-no.
- Zip up: It’s okay to forget to zip up. Someone will remind you. Forgetting to unzip is more serious and may be an indication you’re ready for the nursing home.
- Old enemies: It’s okay to forget your old enemies. They’ll assume you forgave them.
- Old friends: Good friends don’t let old friends forget.
- The way home: Okay, this is serious. I recommend you sew your name and address into your clothes. If you get lost and can’t remember your way home, take out the address and hail a taxi. If you’re driving, use your car’s GPS. If you have a cellphone, use the map system. You can also ask for directions. Try this trick; draw a map on your stomach.
- Eating: It’s okay to forget to eat occasionally. Forgetting to chew is more serious. If you’re like me, the problem isn’t forgetting to eat, it’s forgetting to stop eating.
- Cussing: Cussing is another thing that’s okay to forget. In fact, your family would probably like you to forget to cuss. Unfortunately, cussing is one of the last things people forget.
- Putting the toilet seat down: Female/male dominance aside, forgetting to put the toilet seat down isn’t a big deal. However, forgetting to lift the lid is a big deal. It’s the sort of thing that will send you to the nursing home. Best advice is to use the shower, no seat, no lid.
- Taking a shower: Most people won’t care if you forget to take a shower. Old folks are supposed to smell like old folks. In fact, I think there’s a deodorant for seniors that smells like old mothballs. Better yet just carry mothballs in your pockets. If you don’t like the smell of mothballs, try fabric softener tissues.
- Spelling: Everyone has forgotten how to spell, just like cursive writing. Just use spellchecker.
- Where you parked your car: I hate forgetting where I parked. The best trick is to have a key fob with a locator button. Another trick is to have your significant other with you so one of you can remember where you parked. You can also tie a balloon to your car.
- Why you entered a room: This is another thing I hate. The best solution is to write on your hand what it is you are going for. If you forget to look at your hand, that’s a separate issue. If your hand turns black because it’s covered with reminders, that’s separate issue.
- Significant other’s birthday: This is a big deal; not because it’s your soulmate, but because it’s the password to half of your stuff. Once again, sneak a peek at their driver’s license. It might be best if you made a copy of their license.
I’m sure there are other things best forgotten or remembered but these are my top picks. Truth is, I forgot the rest.
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