Monte R Anderson - Author
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Noah calls God on a cellphone.

3/24/2014

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There is a lot of media buzz about the new show, Noah which opens in America this week. It is a $130 million blockbuster with #Russell Crowe in the lead role. There is a lot of controversy about the artistic license taken by the director. What if Noah had a cellphone?    

#Noah calls #God on his cellphone.

NOAH: Hello, God?

GOD: Yes, Noah?

NOAH: Oh, you have caller ID?

GOD: Don’t need it. I’m all knowing. Sup?

NOAH: I need an extension on that deadline 2 finish the ark. Things are crazy down here.

GOD: No, Noah. I will flood the world on schedule.

NOAH: But, God, first the carpenters went on strike. Then the shipment of tar was delayed. Some of the female animals are in heat and causing riots. Plus, the village passed a new ordinance that says I can’t build a structure that high. Now the Coast Guard wants me to install lifeboats and life vests.

GOD: Finish the ark on time.

NOAH: But God, the lions and tigers keep eating the others, so I have to constantly get replacements. I took on two rabbits and now I have 58 rabbits. Don’t even ask me about the flies. The code enforcement inspectors want bribes.

GOD: No extension!

NOAH: But God. You don’t know how bad things are down here.

GOD: No, Noah, I DO know. That’s why I am sending the flood. Any questions?

NOAH: Just one; what’s a cubit?

I received several comments on my last blog about profanity in the military. Most of the comments were from veterans. Apparently, there is profanity in the military. Who knew?

 




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    Monte is the author of 8 e-books: 3 novels, 3 non-fiction, 1 collection of short stories, and 1 novelette.

    Buy Monte's e-books:
    The Register cliff Rapist
    The Clone Murders,
    Archimedes of Syracuse: Leonardo da Vinci's Mentor,
    Leadership for New Managers: Book Two

    FREE E-BOOKS:
    Angels and Gargoyles

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