In honor of International Women’s Day, I post this helpful dictionary for men.
No. (Never, nada, nyet, negatory, negative, not in a zillion years, not if you were the last man on earth) This one is rather simple. “No” means “no” in every language.
Yes. “Yes” doesn’t always mean yes. Usually it does. Sometimes it means maybe. Procedure with caution.
Fine! Run for cover, save yourself. “Fine” doesn’t mean everything is fine. It just means end of conversation. It doesn’t mean all is forgotten. It means that this discussion will be continued later. Later could mean any where from ten minutes to ten years.
Do whatever you want. This is a trap. Under no circumstance do whatever you want. Proceed with extreme caution. You are on thin ice.
I don’t want a gift. This is another trap. Do not assume that you need not buy a gift. You must buy a gift.
Excuse me? This is the ultimate trap – a set up. Do not repeat what you just said. You have said something stupid or rude and are about to have the rug pulled out from under you. Act like you don’t understand what you just said.
Is that your final answer? This is another trap. Never say “Yes, that’s my final answer and I’m sticking to it.” It means your significant other already has a rebuttal ready and as soon as you stop talking she will lambaste you.
I like your best friend, brother, sister. This is a red flag. Your SO finds someone else attractive. You will soon breakup.
Does this make me look fat? There is no good answer to this question. Never say “Yes”. Say something like, “It makes you look younger”.
I love you just the way you are. This is a bold face lie. Women say this to make men lower their guard; then immediately they try to make changes.
Are you going to wear that? This is not a question. It means go change into something more acceptable. It is not a request. Just do and save yourself a big hassle.
I hope this helps men understand what women say a little better.
No. (Never, nada, nyet, negatory, negative, not in a zillion years, not if you were the last man on earth) This one is rather simple. “No” means “no” in every language.
Yes. “Yes” doesn’t always mean yes. Usually it does. Sometimes it means maybe. Procedure with caution.
Fine! Run for cover, save yourself. “Fine” doesn’t mean everything is fine. It just means end of conversation. It doesn’t mean all is forgotten. It means that this discussion will be continued later. Later could mean any where from ten minutes to ten years.
Do whatever you want. This is a trap. Under no circumstance do whatever you want. Proceed with extreme caution. You are on thin ice.
I don’t want a gift. This is another trap. Do not assume that you need not buy a gift. You must buy a gift.
Excuse me? This is the ultimate trap – a set up. Do not repeat what you just said. You have said something stupid or rude and are about to have the rug pulled out from under you. Act like you don’t understand what you just said.
Is that your final answer? This is another trap. Never say “Yes, that’s my final answer and I’m sticking to it.” It means your significant other already has a rebuttal ready and as soon as you stop talking she will lambaste you.
I like your best friend, brother, sister. This is a red flag. Your SO finds someone else attractive. You will soon breakup.
Does this make me look fat? There is no good answer to this question. Never say “Yes”. Say something like, “It makes you look younger”.
I love you just the way you are. This is a bold face lie. Women say this to make men lower their guard; then immediately they try to make changes.
Are you going to wear that? This is not a question. It means go change into something more acceptable. It is not a request. Just do and save yourself a big hassle.
I hope this helps men understand what women say a little better.
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